I enjoy watching people’s reactions when I tell them about my weekend. Take going to the church service for example. As I left the hotel and told the desk attendant that I would be going to church, she had a surprised look on her face- “you’re going to a church service?” Maybe most hotel guests don’t go (or mention they’re going?).
Then today when I went to work I told a young Australian company that’s working with a partner organization of ACDI/VOCA that I had gone and they were both surprised as well- I guess they didn’t think to go.
When I told the driver who takes me from the hotel to work and back, he thought that was great, figured out which one and said he would invite me to his church service sometime.
At work, the Ghanaian workers I told were surprised, as were the non-Ghanaian workers. I was surprised how no one thought that sounded normal or legitimate. I guess you think of touring, shopping and sight seeing but not so much a 3+ hour church service.
I did tell one of my bosses, an American who has lived in Ghana for many years, and he mentioned that there are some major Christian churches- Presbyterian, Methodist, Apostolic, etc.- and then there were the evangelical churches which could be a lot of moving and shaking. Well that helped me to determine that I had attended an evangelical service! :)
Jumping ship to a reaction on advice:
After having three strangers confess their love for me, two marriage proposals and two invites to a concert (the Ghanaians are famous for their marriage proposals), I decided to ask someone at work what to do/how to say no. I wasn’t sure if there were cultural issues, if I should try to save-face, etc. I saw the Australian girl, but being married she had an easy out. Granted I told the taxi driver that I was married (his response: is he Ghanaian? I said No, he’s from the U.S. and then he pipes up “What do you have against Ghanaian’s” My response, “Nothing, I’ve only been here 7 days” lol).
So I asked a European in the office if she gets marriage proposals and with a nod and eye-roll, I knew I wasn’t alone in my annoyance with the “big” question. I asked what to do, how to respond and she was quick in answering!
‘Tell them your married. Tell them your married and you have kids. Don’t worry about being nice. Tell them and walk away.’
So based on her advice and learning from my experiences, the tricks are:
-To not smile (okay I laughed, a marriage proposal was kinda funny when you’re not expecting it)
-Be sure and mention the husband and it sounds like kids too (I did find out saying ‘I have a boyfriend and we are very much in love’ means nothing!)
-Be blunt (I remember once holding out my hands to signal ‘time out’ and was like here’s the deal and you need to leave now- I wasn’t finished with my dinner so he had to be the one to leave, not me)
-Walk away (when possible)
But all of this is really making me wonder if Ghanaians just go up to any person and ask them to marry or if that’s reserved for abruni’s (white women)? Maybe I can ask Cornelia, a Ghanaian, at work and if so, how does she say no? :)
(Although since writing this, I mentioned to a car of Ghanaian co-workers the proposals and they erupted in laughter- but they all have such a great sense of humor that the laughter didn't answer too many questions other than it obviously happens)
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